Patches

Ahhh...

Well, what do you know? You're Tarnished, like me.

Now, how did I get that wrong?

I took you for a demi-human, or some such.

An innocent mistake, I assure you.

Well, water under the bridge. Now we're squared up, how about we play nice from now on?

A true man of reason. Just what I like about you.

I'm Patches. Patches the Untethered.

Tarnished, like you, only, free-spirited. Nomadic, you might say.

Only for now, those retired-soldiers-turned-bandits they're paying for my gruel.

In exchange for my, well, showing them the ropes.

But honestly... this looting racket is bloody terrifying.

Frankly, I'm ready to wash my hands clean. Maybe set up a legitimate shop.

So, don't be a stranger, eh?

I'll be ready to wheel and deal, come next time.

Ha ha ha...

Slow down, son...

What's the matter? This simply isn't like you.

You've always known an innocent mistake when you see one.

Well, suit yourself.

I'm Patches. Patches the Untethered.

Tarnished, like you, only, free-spirited. Nomadic, you might say.

Only for now, those retired-soldiers-turned-bandits are paying for my gruel.

In exchange for my, well, showing them the ropes.

But honestly... this looting racket is bloody terrifying.

I'm ready to wash my hands clean. Maybe set up a legitimate shop.

So, don't be a stranger, eh?

I'll be ready to wheel and deal, come next time.

Ha ha ha...

Don't forget to pop back for another visit, friend.

I'll be ready to wheel and deal, come next time.

Well, nice of you to drop in, finally.

It's all a bit ad hoc, but I'm sure you'll find something.

And welcome to Patches' Emporium.

Where you won't need a refund, 'cause everything's top notch.

So. Do you need something from me?

Well, it looks like you've seen the error of your ways.

...

Water under the bridge. Am I wrong?

We'll call it a momentary lapse of judgment. "All's well", as you know.

So, what can I do you for today?

Oh yes, by the way. I'm saying goodbye to the old cave.

I'm untethered, by nature, and It's about time that I moved on.

No worries, the old gang will inherit the shop.

They may not speak a word, but they never forget a face.

Spare them some coin after I'm gone, eh?

Hello, again. Welcome to Patches' Emporium.

Forgot something on your shopping list?

No, no trouble to me.

Ah, oh... How in blazes... You're alive.

You had me proper scared. Poofing away in a flash like that.

Maybe it's a sign to keep your mitts off what's not rightly yours, hmm?

But I'll forgive you. View it as a learning experience.

At any rate, it's nice just to see you safe.

And don't miss all the bargains, here at Patches' Emporium!

Ah, oh... How in blazes... You're alive.

You had me proper scared. Poofing away in a flash like that.

Who on earth spends their time booby-trapping treasure chests?

No way I could've known, but still, I apologise. It's all very unfortunate.

At any rate, it's nice just to see you safe.

And don't miss all the bargains, here at Patches' Emporium!

Yeah, I had those bandits make a clean break.

Now they're all suppliers, and good ones at that.

I mean, they don't understand a word I'm saying,

but it hardly matters, we have a natural connection.

They're all foot soldiers. Survivors of a defeated army.

Worked to the bone by their high-and-mighty lord, only to be thrown out with the rubbish.

...It's the same old story, everywhere I go. Ah, to hell with it all.

Hm? Wondering what's inside the treasure chest?

Well, it's uh, nothing too special.

Just something I'm saving as thanks, for a very valuable customer...

But then again, it would fetch some spectacular coin...

And besides, this valuable customer could be a long time coming...

Eh? Everything is give and take, give and take.

By the way, friend...

You've really been there for me, through thick and thin.

And so, I've made up my mind. I bequeath that chest to you.

An extra-special thanks, for an extra-special customer.

What's wrong? I've made up my mind.

The treasure chest is yours, in word and deed.

Sure, it may be worth its weight in gold.

But a Patches Promise? Well, that's priceless!

Stingy little beggar...

Try to find it in your heart next time, eh?

Cheers for that.

Oh, well! It's been a long while.

It's me. Patches the Untethered.

I'm still in business, if you can believe it.

Now I'm my only supplier, so I haven't got much, but everything here is top notch.

Patches' Emporium, now open in Raya Lucaria.

Well, fancy meeting you here.

Hold on, don't you say a word, my friend.

I spoke no lie, not a one.

You were trapped inside a volcano, no mistake,

but the Erdtree was right outside. You just had to spring yourself out.

I'm willing to admit. I could have been more clear.

But I did not lie, and you're perfectly unscathed. All's well that ends well, right?

By the way, have you met that girl Rya?

She's a strange one, but I believe she was in need of help.

Not that it's any of my business, but...

If she rings your bell, why not lend her an ear?

You're...making your way to the Erdtree, no?

Well I heard something that might help. A special means of reaching your destination.

Have you ever seen an iron virgin?

The clunky contraptions are whirlwinds of sickles and spiked wheels.

...but long ago, they were endowed with a spell of transposition.

And get this. A surviving virgin sits at the bottom of the big waterwheel in the Academy of Raya Lucaria.

Its transpositional powers fully intact.

So, right, if you get caught in it on purpose...

It'll chuck you out straight at the base of the Erdtree... Or so I'm told...

Ha ha...ha ha...

Oh yeah, great story isn't it. I'll tell you as many times as you like.

There's a surviving Iron Virgin at the bottom of the big waterwheel in the Academy of Raya Lucaria.

And I heard...if you let yourself get caught in it, it'll chuck you out straight at the base of the Erdtree.

Heh heh...ha ha...

Oh, erm, hello, yes.

Strange place for a chance encounter, eh?

Thought I could use a rest. Don't mind me, go about your business.

Right, over there, see that? Something's shimmering, I swear.

Well, it looks like you've seen the error of your ways.

...

Water under the bridge. Am I wrong?

We'll call it a momentary lapse of judgment. "All's well", as you know.

What is it? Oh, don't mind me. Off you trot.

Right over there, see that? Something's shimmering, I swear.

Well, you've joined the Manor, eh?

I don't believe it. Didn't think you had it in you.

All good, though. We're on the same side, now.

We'll do good work together.

Well, you've joined the Manor, eh?

I don't believe it. Didn't think you had it in you.

And here I thought Rya was barking up the wrong tree...

All good, though. We're on the same side, now.

We'll do good work together.

Ahh, hello, what impeccable timing.

This is for you.

You're new here at the Manor.

But if you complete the request, you can improve your standing.

Relax, we're old friends. Time's come to pass the torch, right?

Go on, break a leg, then.

Heh heh...

Oh, and of course, we can do business, if you like.

Patches' Emporium at the Volcano ManorGrace. Specially for you.

What's the matter? Having trouble nabbing your prey?

Well, I wouldn't go asking for help so soon.

We're not here to make your life easier.

Do you remember your vow to Tanith? To rise against the Erdtree.

Dare I say your heart was never in it to begin with?

What's the matter? Having trouble nabbing your prey?

Well, I wouldn't go asking for help so soon.

We're not here to make your life easier.

Do you remember your vow to Tanith? To rise against the Erdtree.

You and Diallos both. Perhaps your hearts were never in it to begin with?

You hunted down Tragoth?

Are you certain?

No, it's quite alright, fine work, indeed.

I'll give Tanith the news.

Have some rest, by all means.

Hmph.

Sharper than you seem, aren't you...

I was just holding onto it for you, you know.

Here you go. The reward for hunting Tragoth. All yours.

Are you surprised? That I belong to the Volcano ManorGrace.

I always hated the gibberish about lost grace and the laughable Two Fingers.

I thought I could lend a hand in unmasking the charade.

Not to mention Tanith has always made me curious.

I guess her master must really be something, cause she's pretty damn smug about it.

Even after announcing her blasphemous ambitions, she still stands proud.

I've never seen a woman quite like her...

Now you've gone and killed Rykard?

You scheming little bastard.

Cripes, you make this nonsense seem, well, less nonsensical...

Perhaps a Tarnished will be Elden Lord after all...

But for now, this Manor is finished.

The demigod beast is slain, and Tanith has lost her head.

A fine mess, but how else could it end when daddy ambition is head over heels courting lady blasphemy.

Heh heh...ha ha...

Well, here I am. Untethered, once again.

Good-bye, my friend.

What is it?

Oh, come to make a parting donation to Patches' Emporium?

Ah, oh, you again...

A shame you had to see me like this...

Ohh, I had a bit of a slip-up, that's all.

I should have stuck to what I know best...

No matter. I know I-I can trust you.

Gullible, yes, but a good soul.

Make certain that Tanith gets this.

You're able, then?

Then I can rest easy, my friend...

Oh, it's nothing, it's just... Makes me sick to see her all bent out of shape.

C'mon, Tanith, back on your high horse, where you belong.

Ahhh...

It's been ages since I've seen you.

I didn't even realise it was you.

Took you for a demi-human, or some such.

You know how it is, just an innocent mistake.

Water under the bridge, eh, back to business as usual?

Hell's bells...

This bandit business is hardly what it's cracked up to be...

Especially if we keep running into the likes of you...

...Maybe I'll set up another shop with the lads...

...Maybe I'll set up another shop with the lads...

Well, finally made it, eh, and just in time.

For the grand reopening of Patches' Emporium.

Where you won't need a refund, 'cause everything is top notch!

Forgot something on your shopping list?

No trouble to me.

What, do I have to beg?

Give us a coin or two next time around, will you?

Oh, my, well, here you are again.

So sorry for that. I meant to warn you, but whoops! There you went.

Despite my best intentions, I've done you wrong, I have.

But here you are, standing tall and proud. All's well that ends well, eh.

And my warning was spot-on, you tell me different!

Stay clear of Volcano ManorGrace, end of discussion.

I heard the brutes there hunt Tarnished like animals.

Stay clear of Volcano ManorGrace, end of discussion.

I heard the brutes there hunt Tarnished like animals.

There's a special circle, for rotten thieves like you.

Try not to be so slow on the uptake, eh.

Ngh!

What are you playing at? That bloody well hurts!

What's wrong with you?

It's me, Patches. Patches!

Enough now, stop!

Well, well, well?

Thought you'd just help yourself to a man's personal belongings?

You scheming little thief. The gods demand repentance!

Cough up your coin, all of it!

Wait, wait, please!

I surrender! White flag and all!

Cripes, are you dense, boy?

Fine, have it your way. You'll get what's coming.

We're about to make out like Bandits, boys!

For Pete's sake! I concede!

No one likes a bull-headed brute, you know!

I yield, yield! You can't harm a yielding man!

Hm? Wait, don't tell me, is that you?

Oh, cripes, please, wait!

Cripes! Are you dense, mate?

What in the world has gotten into you!

Fine, have it your way. You'll get what's coming.

Don't go thinking I'm a soft touch!

Do you even hear me? I said "surrender", loud and clear!

No one likes a bull-headed brute!

You'd clobber your old mate, then, would you?

I surrender! I surrender, I swear!

Last chance to surrender, mate.

Grovel...and I'll forgive you.

Ugh. Hard of hearing, are we?

Fine, have it your way. You'll get what's coming!

Don't go thinking I'm a soft touch!

Well... It was bound to happen some day...

What a shit show...

Well, finally come around, have you?

I knew you would. You're a man of reason, through-and-through.

Ha ha ha...

Okay, I can see you mean it.

Consider it water under the bridge.

A momentary lapse of judgment. "All's well", as you know.

Well, glad to see we're on the same page.

I'd never cross you, not even close.